My grandmother died last week. It wasn't entirely unexpected, but it was sad nonetheless. But she lived to a ripe age of 89 and was a follower of Christ. She was ready to go. It was bitter-sweet.
When my grandfather died ten years ago, he had a funeral in the church but there was no graveside/burial service. Whoever wanted said a few words and that was about it. So this time, especially since there was to be only one service (at the graveside) I offered my father the option of me presiding over a simple burial service. In the end, they found a pastor from the Calvary Chapel my grandmother used to attend and he presided over the service.
I'm sad to say I was pretty disappointed with the service. In true Calvary Chapel form, it was very informal. But, what's worse, while the pastor talked a lot, very little was actually said. There was virtually no Scripture reading, no presentation of the Gospel, no comfort given to the grieving in the objective work of Christ on their behalf, and no talk about the Resurrection. If I would have given the homily, I would probably have said something like the following. It's by no means perfect, but I think it touches upon some of the more important points of objective comfort for Christians:
I'd like to make a few brief remarks about Death. It is common in our society to refer to the one who has died as having "passed away." There is, obviously, a sense in which this true. The Apostle Paul tells us in his 2nd letter to the Corinthians that, for those who are in Christ, when our spirit is absent from the body, it is in the presence of the Lord. So, in a way, one's spirit could be said to have "passed away" into God's presence. However, this type of language concerning death is not found in Scripture. The phrase actually comes from Mary Baker Eddy, the founder of the "Christian Science" religion.
We also hear quite commonly in our society that "death is just a natural part of life" along with frequent references to the so-called "circle of life." These concepts are not Christian either. At best, they each serve to minimize the reality of death, to try to lighten its effects. And, for those who have not the hope we do, this is all they can do--try to minimize death.
In contrast, Christianity has a very real and "earthy" understanding of death. Death is not "a natural part of life." It is the most unnatural thing in the universe! When God created Man in his image, he was intended to live forever. The human race was designed to live and work and play and fellowship with each other and their Creator. But Death was not a natural part of the original scheme. It's just not right; it's not the way life is supposed to be.
As we know, once sin entered the world--when Adam and Eve rebelled against God--everything changed. The holy and righteous God who cannot tolerate self-centered rebellion against Him did what his righteous character required: he demanded justice, and pronounced the Curse upon upon Adam and Eve and all their descendants. And so, not only did all the sons of Adam and daughters of Eve inherit an unquenchable desire to continue that rebellion against God--but we also all inherited the just effects of the Curse that God placed upon our original parents.
Toil and labor, pain and suffering, sickness and, finally, death--all are results of the Curse. They are not our friends, they are our enemies. And, therefore, it is right--to an extent--to hate and despise them. This is freeing because, as Christians, we do not have to go around stoically biting our lips, pretending that all is wonderful and cheery in the world, whenever we face physical suffering or emotional pain.
From time to time, when I think about Leila dying, I cry. And I cry not only because I am going to miss her. To be sure, I have immense sorrow for my and the world's loss of her. But I have deep sorrow and anger at the bitterness, the finality (in a sense), and the plain unnaturalness of death. Scripture describes, and even personifies, Death as our "enemy." And so it is good and right to mourn for our loss--and also to be angry at death.
BUT--and this is a big but--while Christians do mourn, we do not grieve as those who have no hope! Though death will likely strike us all down, God's Word tells us that Jesus Christ has taken away the sting of death. In his death on the Cross, Jesus Christ triumphed over sin--he bore the eternal punishment of those who trust in him. But, at his resurrection, He triumphed over death and the grave. So the Apostle Paul asks the question: "O death, where is your victory? O death, where is your sting?!"
In his resurrection from the dead, Jesus Christ has become the firstfruits--the down-payment, the guarantee--of our own resurrection. That Jesus Christ can triumph over sin, death, and hell, is an assurance to us of his power to rescue us from the same enemies.
God gives us assurance in His Word that Leila's spirit has temporarily departed from her failing body and is in the immediate presence of her loving Savior. But that is not the end. C.S. Lewis once said: "God loves matter. He created it!" When we die, we will not all float around on clouds playing harps for eternity. Instead, we look forward to the reunion of her and our spirits with new and resurrected bodies. We share Job's hope when said: "in my flesh I shall see God." And that is the hope to which we all have to look forward: A new heaven and new earth, with resurrected and restored bodies that will never suffer, never get sick, and never again die. In the the final verse of the Bible our Lord comforts us, saying: "He which testifieth these things saith, 'Surely I come quickly.' Amen. Even so, come, Lord Jesus!" Amen.
